Rubber Nails
David Grosche
There once was fleas
On trees.
But then the Mutant Clown
Cameth down
And turned them
Into cheesecake and danish, not flem.
The pastries were ENSLAVED, --
even then they ranted and raved.
But this Clown overlord
Sent them on the space board,
Sending them to the new Earth,
Where their citizens were many thanks to birth.
The cheesecake was EATTEN,
The danish was BEATTEN,
And this happened for many years,
Causing the pastries many fears.
If they rebelled,
They KNEW they'd be felled.
But then came Dog,
It was not a frog,
But rather the greatest of ALL dogs.
Dog ate the cat Socks,
And then peed on the president instead of the rocks.
The people cheered him on,
And made him first King of America at dawn.
Funny to make a dog the king,
But even stranger was pastries in his cabinet ring.
Dog invaded South America where no longer biscuits were sent,
Because SURELY their minds were bent.
Dog proceeded to conquer Europe after.
When Dog was stabbed by a pencil, soon came laughter.
His son, Maliford, came to the throne.
Talented, but not quite Dog's clone.
The dog conquered Australia and smiled,
But was assassinated by cheesecake and no longer was wild.
The cake was eatten by a cat,
And to the throne came Nephisto the Flat.
Nephisto was a cruel, EVIL one
And Cat the rat planned to toast his buns.
Fluffy the Rotten Pumpkin invaded Africa for him,
Of course at Cat's whim.
Nephisto was soon slain,
With danish still in his brain.
Cat was quickly overthrown by the return of the Mutant Clown,
Who was upset bout the overthrow of the earlier Bill the Brown.
It was a horrible time,
With no crime,
And the lawyers were gone,
So who could get our spirits down?
But then came the man
That had the plan.
Barbarus was his name,
And he thought life was a game.
He stormed the pastry farm,
And noted that they'd not been harmed.
After a skirmish with the overlord's sea monkeys,
By the way, seemed that they were ALL drunkeys,
Barbarus fled with pastries into the Yonk Blat,
Where Blarney snuck aboard and sat on that cat.
Barbarus started off, sure he'd won,
But truly, the fun had JUST begun.
Jojo the pirate,
Still a little bit irate,
Was told to reclaim the goods,
So he covered himself with a hood,
And chased the Yonk Blat to the moon.
(What a MAROON)
Seeing the ship coming on,
Barbarus knew that they knew he was now a con.
He knew not what to do,
And searched frantically for some glue.
He saw the word blue
And smiled as he knew what would be true.
He'd win no matter what,
Even if he had no gut.
He stepped over the 500 danish and had married them
To some guy in the glove compartment named Brem.
He tossed them at the ship
And hit it RIGHT in the hip.
Jojo lost control,
And was beatten down by the con troll.
The sea monkeys behind laughed,
Probably because they never bathed,
And looked at the cheesecake still left,
Swiping much of it, the theft....
Barbarus landed on a world known as Terris,
The monkeys leaping out and shouting, "Dare us!"
Now, instead of freeing the cheesecake,
Barbarus sat THINKING while the peas baked.
He decided to take a bite,
And found it JUST right.
So he found ways to mass 'em
And eat 'em.
The danish might have gotten off easy,
But the cheesecake found it to be REALLY cheesy.
They didn't find it right
That many Terrisians want from them a bite.
They fear though that they might not get eatten --
Instead, beatten....
Indeed, the situation is rubber nails...
:::Barbarus's note:: Any names that might seem to be real or a play on anyone's name is PURELY coincidental,
and noone can sue him for copyrite infringements thanks to some loophole in the Constitution. Also, noone is
allowed to blow up Barbarus's house for this poem without the express consent of the author.
Copyright::Year 376 of Cheesecake, published by some crazy rabbit from Terris.
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